I’m convinced that there is a person who on my side can make every dream of mine come true, and help me realize how capable I’m. Nothing will intimidate me then, and I will not be discouraged no matter how difficult things get; as I will see the biggest motivation with me, to try again and again until I succeed, the craving reason to succeed.
But right now, I’m a mere machine run by food and water, climbing downstairs to get food, walking up to office for paycheck; slack and a pointless thought wandering without purpose.
Warn yourself that you shouldn’t assume you can walk in the dark just because you got a few steps right. You ought to mind every step or you fall.
When I solve a problem, or hear for a job interview is when I get an adrenaline rush. I hope I keep in mind, I’m just walking in the dark, and that I should mind every step, lest I fall, to remind myself that the best is yet to come, and I’m far from complete..
It seems to me that with friends, we often say things we don’t mean especially when we are teasing them. 🙂 I try not to go beyond my limits, but sometimes, very unknowingly I say things I do not mean, and mess things up. As my motivation is not to hurt them with my words, it keeps happening without my knowledge.
I think I know my limits now, and when to stop for the reason that although I’m fine to hear a rebuking voice from friends, I think I cannot take it and digest as I’m not so used to it. Nevertheless, when this does happen, I take a while to digest, and then I’m fine. I do not think I deliberately lose my friends for some silly reason. A Friend In Need, Is A Friend Indeed. 🙂
Out of few things I wished for while being at school, then growing up and becoming a college going boy, then, watching seniors from my hometown make their own jobs, I still see some similarity in the way I wish and hope for my future.
While I was at high school, math was very daunting. I always wished I could just become as seamless as my teacher overnight. Never did it happen, but, gradually, it became okay. While I was at college, the same story just repeated. It just took more time than my peers to get along; I still was having the same expectations as my school days. Hoping things just change all of a sudden, overnight with nearly everything I wanted! When folks from my hometown got jobs, I was travelling along with them to return to college after vacations while they returned to their jobs. As I saw them, I kept wishing that the I would graduate quickly so that I could get a decent job, make some good money.
While I wished for all these, I never felt so very daunted about whether or not I could make it, perhaps I just wasn’t too serious about them or I wasn’t just thinking about whether I could make it or not. But now, I’m wishing for a few things, and a better future. Sometimes they appear just around the corner, sometimes way too unreachable. While they say as long as we keep trying, we get to things, it is just scary and badly sulking when things get stagnant and are just out of your reach, but, yeah, future is just so unknown. The only thing we could do is just wait for it to reveal.
I’ve been reading posts from “Freshly Pressed” for the last 3 days. Ok. Not all, only those that interested me. Of those that I read, some of the musings were very close to what I had in my mind or once I’d thought about. This could also be some kinda of déjà vu feeling! I don’t know. But, I never knew how to put my thoughts on paper.
I’m a bit hesitant and bad at expressing myself. I take time. A lot of time, rather. Like preparing for exams day n night, and sleeping in the exam hall, tired! This seem to be happening with my writing, too. I want to write; about a few things I’ve in mind, see around me, experience everyday. But I lack words, the prose that can hold the reader on my blog for a few minutes, and I thought I should prepare for writing first, then try to write.
Then I remembered that I was posting articles to a contest conducted by “The Week” English magazine. This was during my college days, 6 years back. Never did I felt my writing was poor at that time although I know now how poor my articles were. That made me realize that I improved a bit since then, and its okay to write. So, here I go. I just wrote what I’d in my mind.
”Improvement is gradual. If I could think about something I wish deep inside me, for a long time, and try to pursue strongly, perhaps, I can make my wish come true. And, I’m just trying to write on this blog more.