The concept of God

I’m on a weekend outing to the so called sacred places, planned to finish my trip on Monday. God is clearly a very ubiquitous thing and I don’t consider having any qualification to talk about Him/it. But, when it comes to me believing it the concept of God, I think I’m clear enough, and not afraid to claim that I do not follow the herd or believe Him.
I do not like the general conventions as it seems to me that they are badly diluted, and
insanely commercial and the reason with which we do things are too selfish.

In nearly every temple I visited today(as many as 8), they asked us lit a Deepam. In some temples, it is up to you to lit it, but in some, they carry very special purpose that is clearly invented by some smart guy. When in case it carries special purpose, it is mostly related to the suffering of people, for example, for couple yearning for kids but haven’t had one, for youth that aren’t married, for families that have some kind of problems etc. I go mad with these. reasons. Unfortunately, it seems to me that a majority of us have started fearing God in place of worshiping Him.  It seems to me that those who worship find some kind of relief in doing so, and that’s the best outcome of their prayer.

I might sound ridiculous or wrong, but, well, it looks very evident that we fear the concept of God, or we are very whopping selfish!

And Dear God, if you do exist, just come downstairs once, and claim all the money that people are offering,
and give us some plan on how it should be spent for good reasons. :)

The Difference

As I wrote in my last post, I tried solving the software build time problems by deploying ccache on two branches that have biggest build time.

I was hoping that our designer community “learns” and “uses” the easy and fast ways of building software as communicated. But, some of these guys are so ridiculously dumb that they are habitual to running one command, and they simply do not care for other build commands that are more apt. So, as my colleague said, I enforced ccache carefully to reduce build times. I am waiting to know the results during next week.

In the midst of these annoying problems, I’m often awestruck by the commitment, coordination, power of the open source projects. Being so disconnected physically, they are connected only via internet, or irc, yet, they produce wonderful products. In contrary at certain places, although people are sitting right beside each other, they do not follow the instructions given, creating whole lot of mess for themselves and others delaying the whole delivery.. I simply do not know whom to blame.. I wonder what is the difference between the two set of people..

Doing It Right, At Right Time

We have a serious problem at our office with software build times. I, being the guy who’s supposed to take care of this system, sometimes go blank with no ideas in my mind to relax the situation. We have serious network issues, resource crunch, hardware limitations, etc.
I knew about the bottlenecks, however, what I did not do was, see what can be done quickly to settle things down to some extent. Perhaps, I was close to doing this, but in my own way, that wasn’t the right way for our current situation. So, my boss called for a meeting and listed down a few things that can potentially help us to some extent.

From this point on, I started thinking what did I not do right, at the right time, and having that done, would things have changed? Well, even now, things are still bad, nevertheless, there has been a lot of things I really had thought about, that are now being raised by somebody else again, and to me, it appears like, I never pursued until it is complete.

That seems to be my first drawback. Picking up some task, but not driving it to the end.

Then, there were some issues in the past, I tried to address them, but as long term solution. No short-term solutions were derived by me. That seems to be my second drawback that is slowing me down. Not addressing the problem quickly in short term.

I did have some long term plans to improve this situation, even in the past, but, doing multiple things together is never beneficial. So, that’s my third drawback. Pick one task, finish that up. Or have a schedule of time, for each task, and do nothing else during the time so dedicated.

Take no problem lightly. No matter how small the problem reported, understanding the problem in depth, and acting on it as quickly as possible. This hasn’t been done by me. I did check the reported problems, but, never really had that added to my backlog, and closed it at the earliest possible time. That’s my fourth drawback.

It, so, seems to me that Doing It Right, Doing It At Right Time is a good approach to any problem.
This has been my learning during the 2 days of this short week.
While I learn from my mistakes, and I have gratitude for the tips, I’ve no shame in confessing that I build hatred towards certain acts. Acts of sarcasm, especially when they are expressed indirectly, when things I do are not working although I put my best efforts. I try to shut my emotions, but, when there are no mistakes from my end, I find it hard to control myself.

Things are easy said than done. And I’m trying to do things..


The Only Person You Should Be Better Than

To someone like me who finds it hard to overcome thyself, the hardest thing is the following.

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It is such an inspiring quote, but hard one to practice. I try to be better than what I was yesterday. Often I’m awestruck when I see people who stay happy no matter what. What an amazing strength they have. I often envy them, if have to be very honest. Envy them and try to overcome myself to push myself up by a considerable extent. It is when I fall doing so that I get that horrible feeling that shuts me down for a while, completely. I’m looking for that rhythm of life, if there is such thing existing. Have you found it yet?


Queen The Film

I watched the movie Queen this week. I booked tickets this time to avoid the queue.
The crux of the movie is a young girl who has grown up in an orthodox family finds her stance for the way she is, and I think by changing herself when she is pushed away by her fiance.

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Although I couldn’t understand every dialogue of the movie, I enjoyed watching it, and appreciated many characters in the movie. It seems, everybody has reasons for the way they are as shown in the movie, from the lead actress to her fiance, to her friend VJ to the prostitute from Amsterdam. The more we push our self to appreciate people for being themselves, the happy we keep ourselves, I guess or should I say, we do good by pushing people to change, but lose them if we don’t do it in a sensitive way, as it happens in the movie? I wonder..
I’m often miserably confused, too. I find it difficult to decide what is good and what is bad.. Nevermind, the life still rolls.. The week still runs.. The years still pass.. :)